For a while I've been debating whether or not to post an event, well series of events, that happened to me while Training at USAST....
I've bounced bakc and forth on the idea... thinking on the one hadn it might be best to jsut let the whole issue go while on the other hand it was pretty messed up and people have a right to know.... But based off that I thought well which people should have a right no know? and if I'm jsut telling random people on the internet do I then look like a crazy ranting lunatic?
Still, I think alot of people are curious as to the goings on there beyond the outer layer that is thrown up.... Beyond the books and the press down to the inside... While I'll admit I haven't the foggiest idea as to what goes down on the very deepest levels of management or what exactly is going through peoples minds there.... I can say certain thigns with come level of certainty as I have seen them...
In my 3.5 years training there I've seen some incredibly good things and some extremely bad things.... The worst incident to my moemoy actually directly involved me.... So sit back and let me tell you a tale.... well, I'm not exactly telling you, yours just reading what I wrote but stilll...
Few weeks ago... monday night...
Training was hot as hell in the temple... new rule to wear only
orange robes for level 2... Mind you they are heavy material and after you sweat a bit do nothing to release heat... infact seems like it jsut traps heat after that...
Had already led demo class and was
worn out... class came along and was feeling a little hot.. So, I
decided to drop to the back of line and just take it easy.... Did
like 2 kicks per pass... Shifu was there and another student was leading
class... they were yelling like always to move faster and what not
but I wasn't listening...
At some point during class Shifu decided to go to the back and do
something.... I don't know why but he closed the curtain that seperates the front and back when he
went back... I remember thinking this is a bad idea... Cut what
little air flow there was to nothing... As soon as he did that I
started feeling ill... I went to the window to get some fresh air
..
When i got there I was so over heated I collapsed and started
convulsing on the floor... Couldn't breath... temperature was most
likely well over 100... to the dangerous levels... Straight up
heat stroke... Nearly died on the spot....
The response was something I'll never forget... I had lost
consciousness after hitting the floor during the seizure... Was
having this odd dream thinking am I gonna die? Someone threw some
water on me... People tell me it was shifu which was good... After
that I was slightly more awake shifu just said He's fine its just
the heat and I need to eat more beef... he said don't worry
continue training... At this point I needed an ambulance... but
hey what are ya gonna do...
Anyways people went on training and kinda left me there... After a
few minutes my breathing became erratic again and my heart was
beating uncontrollably... Worst pain I've ever felt in my life...
I felt myself losing consciousness again... my last thought before
that was I am going to die right now....this is it I'm dead...
then lights out....
I'm not exactly sure why but I eventually woke up again... To much
surprise I wasn't dead... mind this this was good news for me..
but I couldn't help wondering why they just left me here and
didn't call for an ambulance or anything...
Took me a week to recover ... Had slight muscle and kidney
damage and was fully traumatized from the event... trouble
sleeping nightmares bouts of depression and panic at random times
during the day.. truly horrible...
So, after a week I was feeling good enough to go back and talk to
the big man and find out what exactly went wrong... the
conversation with him was nothing like I expected...
First he was mad at me that I didn't make an appointment to speak
to him saying I can't jsut walk in and talk to him whenever I
wanted.... Then he was mad at me for a host of other issues... I
didn't go to a book signing for his new book, I wasn't happy enough with his
recent fame, I was upset about the new uniform rule.... He said
he knew i was saying things that were critical of temple or him...
meaning people I would talk to about things would like go and
report if I said anything negative... Some weird gestapo crap...
if you ask me...
I told him all that has nothing to do with what happened to me
monday... He was mad I was mad... and said I was fine and you
never need an ambulance... and that I just don't understand
myself... Then he told me I was negative about everything and a
negative influence on all the people there and he was going to
suspend me for a while.... He said when I figure it out and want
to come back to call and talk to him first...
Since then I've talked to several people and most jump down my
throat saying he did no wrong and there was some hidden meaning to
his actions... its all my fault... lets see what else... there
was no fault was just different perspectives of what happened..
And some other equally strange things...
Of all the people there that night only 1 person apologized for not
doing more... one person tried but it didn't work.... a few have
out right tried to avoid talking to me... and others just avoid
the issue...
Still others have tried to change the story of what happened... saying I wasn't shaking on the floor and was only resting quitely on my own....
Brotherhood, understanding, compassion..... I don't see it...
I never expected everyone there to be saints that could do no wrong... Though I did expect them to have my back in the event of a critical medical emergency.... Funny but one guy told me "If you fall I got your back man" just a few days before... though that night he was oddly busy at the time I guess... But like I said I never expected them to be perfect.... Still, it says something profound I think...
The reactions since then have smacked of a cut like atmosphere... people thinking there must be something else to it... aside from that people NEED there to be something else to it.... Doesn't matter what actually happened that night... the very idea is opposite of their built of views of the temple and their master.... In this respecct it borders religious fanaticism.... just like you could never convince a born again christain evolution is true.... even if you show them the fossil records... there will always be denial there...
Theres a fine line, I think, between devotion and loyalty and being a full blown cult....
Since then I've moved on and joined a new school... Alot more laid back which better instruction actually... yan Ming may be a very good martial artist but hes a sucky teacher....
And In closing..... No one would object if I came on and posted a story that paints a rossy picture of the place... saying its all sunshine and rainbows.... Unfortunatly it isn't true....
I think one should try to udnerstand the good and bad aspects of all thigns and feel free to openly discuss both.... I was scolded for even thinking critical things and booted because of it.... I guess yesmen are always more appealing... But how are you to learn anything if the answer is always yes? or more to the point when you can not say critical things....
I made a girl cry once before a demo because I told her to "work on your staff form to make it sharp, I noticed you struggling with it the other day.... so, practice that alot today so it can really cook"
Ah wells..... I'm tired of typing now.... ask questions make comments say whatever.... say good thigns say bad things I dont care....
Its all good to me...
I've bounced bakc and forth on the idea... thinking on the one hadn it might be best to jsut let the whole issue go while on the other hand it was pretty messed up and people have a right to know.... But based off that I thought well which people should have a right no know? and if I'm jsut telling random people on the internet do I then look like a crazy ranting lunatic?
Still, I think alot of people are curious as to the goings on there beyond the outer layer that is thrown up.... Beyond the books and the press down to the inside... While I'll admit I haven't the foggiest idea as to what goes down on the very deepest levels of management or what exactly is going through peoples minds there.... I can say certain thigns with come level of certainty as I have seen them...
In my 3.5 years training there I've seen some incredibly good things and some extremely bad things.... The worst incident to my moemoy actually directly involved me.... So sit back and let me tell you a tale.... well, I'm not exactly telling you, yours just reading what I wrote but stilll...
Few weeks ago... monday night...
Training was hot as hell in the temple... new rule to wear only
orange robes for level 2... Mind you they are heavy material and after you sweat a bit do nothing to release heat... infact seems like it jsut traps heat after that...
Had already led demo class and was
worn out... class came along and was feeling a little hot.. So, I
decided to drop to the back of line and just take it easy.... Did
like 2 kicks per pass... Shifu was there and another student was leading
class... they were yelling like always to move faster and what not
but I wasn't listening...
At some point during class Shifu decided to go to the back and do
something.... I don't know why but he closed the curtain that seperates the front and back when he
went back... I remember thinking this is a bad idea... Cut what
little air flow there was to nothing... As soon as he did that I
started feeling ill... I went to the window to get some fresh air
..
When i got there I was so over heated I collapsed and started
convulsing on the floor... Couldn't breath... temperature was most
likely well over 100... to the dangerous levels... Straight up
heat stroke... Nearly died on the spot....
The response was something I'll never forget... I had lost
consciousness after hitting the floor during the seizure... Was
having this odd dream thinking am I gonna die? Someone threw some
water on me... People tell me it was shifu which was good... After
that I was slightly more awake shifu just said He's fine its just
the heat and I need to eat more beef... he said don't worry
continue training... At this point I needed an ambulance... but
hey what are ya gonna do...
Anyways people went on training and kinda left me there... After a
few minutes my breathing became erratic again and my heart was
beating uncontrollably... Worst pain I've ever felt in my life...
I felt myself losing consciousness again... my last thought before
that was I am going to die right now....this is it I'm dead...
then lights out....
I'm not exactly sure why but I eventually woke up again... To much
surprise I wasn't dead... mind this this was good news for me..
but I couldn't help wondering why they just left me here and
didn't call for an ambulance or anything...
Took me a week to recover ... Had slight muscle and kidney
damage and was fully traumatized from the event... trouble
sleeping nightmares bouts of depression and panic at random times
during the day.. truly horrible...
So, after a week I was feeling good enough to go back and talk to
the big man and find out what exactly went wrong... the
conversation with him was nothing like I expected...
First he was mad at me that I didn't make an appointment to speak
to him saying I can't jsut walk in and talk to him whenever I
wanted.... Then he was mad at me for a host of other issues... I
didn't go to a book signing for his new book, I wasn't happy enough with his
recent fame, I was upset about the new uniform rule.... He said
he knew i was saying things that were critical of temple or him...
meaning people I would talk to about things would like go and
report if I said anything negative... Some weird gestapo crap...
if you ask me...
I told him all that has nothing to do with what happened to me
monday... He was mad I was mad... and said I was fine and you
never need an ambulance... and that I just don't understand
myself... Then he told me I was negative about everything and a
negative influence on all the people there and he was going to
suspend me for a while.... He said when I figure it out and want
to come back to call and talk to him first...
Since then I've talked to several people and most jump down my
throat saying he did no wrong and there was some hidden meaning to
his actions... its all my fault... lets see what else... there
was no fault was just different perspectives of what happened..
And some other equally strange things...
Of all the people there that night only 1 person apologized for not
doing more... one person tried but it didn't work.... a few have
out right tried to avoid talking to me... and others just avoid
the issue...
Still others have tried to change the story of what happened... saying I wasn't shaking on the floor and was only resting quitely on my own....
Brotherhood, understanding, compassion..... I don't see it...
I never expected everyone there to be saints that could do no wrong... Though I did expect them to have my back in the event of a critical medical emergency.... Funny but one guy told me "If you fall I got your back man" just a few days before... though that night he was oddly busy at the time I guess... But like I said I never expected them to be perfect.... Still, it says something profound I think...
The reactions since then have smacked of a cut like atmosphere... people thinking there must be something else to it... aside from that people NEED there to be something else to it.... Doesn't matter what actually happened that night... the very idea is opposite of their built of views of the temple and their master.... In this respecct it borders religious fanaticism.... just like you could never convince a born again christain evolution is true.... even if you show them the fossil records... there will always be denial there...
Theres a fine line, I think, between devotion and loyalty and being a full blown cult....
Since then I've moved on and joined a new school... Alot more laid back which better instruction actually... yan Ming may be a very good martial artist but hes a sucky teacher....
And In closing..... No one would object if I came on and posted a story that paints a rossy picture of the place... saying its all sunshine and rainbows.... Unfortunatly it isn't true....
I think one should try to udnerstand the good and bad aspects of all thigns and feel free to openly discuss both.... I was scolded for even thinking critical things and booted because of it.... I guess yesmen are always more appealing... But how are you to learn anything if the answer is always yes? or more to the point when you can not say critical things....
I made a girl cry once before a demo because I told her to "work on your staff form to make it sharp, I noticed you struggling with it the other day.... so, practice that alot today so it can really cook"
Ah wells..... I'm tired of typing now.... ask questions make comments say whatever.... say good thigns say bad things I dont care....
Its all good to me...
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