DOC IN THAI JAIL

[Maestro]

i remember it was all over alot of other forums and everyone believed it, but i smoked entirely to much weed to remember my response i remember the email

[doc]

I kind of look at this as one of the highlights of russbo.com, LOL. Along with the Shi De Cheng family reunion one I wrote...

[dogchow108]

honestly...i never bothered to find out why. Doc landing himself in a jail, while unlikely, is actually quite believable once posted somewhere. ya got me...

[Uwe]

Doc you might be better of closing this one.

[doc]

Well, this has certainly gotten out of hand.

My wife discovered this thread, and thought that I "wasn't the man that she thought I was". Oh, it's comical. Maybe a little explanation is in order, after all of these years.

We of the russbo team typically did some sort of wild and whacky nonsense for the April Fools Day thing, every year. To not make it obvious, we usually posted stuff sometime before and after April 1st of each year. And usually, we poked fun at whatever was "hot" on the internet (or our forums) at the time. I would refer to it as "relative satire dosed with a portion of bullshit". Thus, all the stuff you see in the Shaolin Satire section, and some of the nonsense in the Forum Archive.

But this thread was a doozey. I had gone so far as to hijack Blooming Lotus's account, "make her an admin", have her "take over the site", and send out member wide emails notifying people that I was in jail. I had discontinued my almost daily appearances on the forum, to make the account more consistent. That along with some pictures taken with some of my Thai Police officer friends, and I had created a satirical, comical, nonsensical, yet believable story. So believable, that people on other forums were talking about it. For months.

And now, to this day, people still fall for it. Including my wife, who knows me better than most.

So, just for clarification, for those of you who don't realize that this is in the Shaolin Satire section, I was not in a Thai jail, nor did I do anything unnatural with multitudes of Thai women or animals. And anything else that was posted here.

It was all for fun. And boy, did this one go places.

[onesp1ng]

wait a minute, you weren't in jail? but what about all my "sources?"

[doc]

The "coughing chicken" comment, during the Bird Flu crisis I might add, didn't make anyone wonder?

People to this day STILL think I was in jail. You should see the emails, lol...

[master splinter]

I swear up till now i wasnt sure if it was fact or fiction... 13 women??? i was skeptical, but the water buffalo had me wondering...

[onesp1ng]

my sources tell me that doc might be laid up in prison, again. oh, oh dear, what will his poor disciples do, this time, without the Mighty Baldess of the Great One to shelter and console them???

Free Doc! free Doc! free Doc! Free Doc! free Doc! free Doc!

[doc]

Are you in jail?
Heard the rumor. Just curious.

Actually, no. Not now, never have been.

But, there's an interesting story behind all of this. And it really kind of got out of hand after a while. I just never really sat down and wrote about it.

It involves a few members of the gang here. Believe it or not, but Onesp1ng was largely responsible, very indirectly, as well as Blooming Lotus, for this jail thing.

I'll write about it soon....

[Steve]

Ladys?

Don't get too excited at the "ladys" in the picture, some if not all of them might have a penis.

[Princess]

American freed from prison, starts new life

A surprise to all involved.

A new unexpected event occurred today in the criminal case involving Richard Russell, an American citizen turned expat turned alleged felon.

Russell had been arrested on charges of aggravated sexual assault, indecency, loitering and cruelty to animals about four weeks ago, after a week and a half long foray into debauchery and sodomy at a local Thai massage parlor. Thirteen local Thai women, and a water buffalo, had been involved.

"We just don't understand it", said Suttipong Tamachara, the Talang Provincial prosecutor in charge of the case. "We lost all of our witnesses. Every last one of them. And, someone ate the damn water buffalo."

Apparently, all thirteen of the young Thai women that were involved, have left the province.

"Some have gone home to their families, some, have disappeared locally, probably to work in other massage places", Namiwan Pluntokowaen, the court appointed Thai attorney who was representing Russell, explained. "We understand that one of girls, supposedly the one that had spent the most time with Russell, has left Thailand with a wealthy foreigner, to enter the United States. We believe that she is currently working as a professional dancer in Las Vegas, and is studying to become a lawyer. I'm also told that she's a deceitful lying whore, and that she probably wouldn't have made a good witness anyway."

Russell was released on April 30th, after spending over four weeks in the Talang Provincial prison.

"It wasn't that bad you know, being the biggest guy in the joint gives you a certain amount of, let's say,'privileges'. You get to be first on the food line, get your choice of bed, and, get the best work opportunities." Russell claimed that he actually found the experience to be rather enlightening, and, ironically, a much needed break from the doldrums of his typical life.

"Bubba. That's me. Da boss. Beat the living shit out of anyone that got in my way. None of that faggot kung fu shit mind you, just pure Brooklyn fists, like my grandma taught me. Those little Thai bastards ain't seen nothing like it. I ruled the damn place, ruled. Yea, it was kind of fun actually." Russell stated that even though the prison in Talang was a dangerous place, he never really felt threatened. "I liked being Bubba. Yea, that's what all those incarcerated little bastards started to call me. Bubba. And I had a name for every one of them. There was Jenny, and Jenny, and, oh, some little guy that everyone liked, yea, his name was, umm, Jenny."

Upon release, the now famous Talong ex-prisoner made his way to Patong to start a new life.

"My damn defense attorney took everything I had. Didn't do a damn thing. Just visited me in prison and told me not to worry. Never had a plan, never had a clue as to what to do. They're all the same I tell you, all the same. ****ing attorneys. ****ing useless money hungry bastards. They should all rot in hell."

Rumor has it that Russell, no longer clean shaven, has found new employment in the local bar district of Patong.

[dogchow108]

holy ****. whats been going on since ive been gone lol

[technojesus]

Yeah i just called a friend of mine down in the Phuket area who confirmed this story for me... I'm going to try and figure out when the trial is and maybe go down to Phuket and visit Rich in jail, after all he's the one that got me started here in Thailand...

[onesp1ng]

so the case will go to trail. when? And what kind of chances does he have of getting off?