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Here he is!
Walking the mall tonight to do some shopping and get food, I was barraged by people I didn’t really know. Waitresses, sales girls, people that just worked in various stores here and there, in Central, Phuket’s largest mall, here in Thailand.
And the question everyone asked in a mixture of “Tinglish” was “How is madam?” The question was accompanied by some rotund maneuver with their hands, gently circling over their abdomen. These people knew Vanessa had been pregnant, and they were surprised to see that I was alone. I had no idea who most of these people were. How she makes so many friends is beyond me. Telling them that she’s in the hospital does nothing but cause them to exclaim something about “see baby”.
Of course, no one asked how I was. The birth of a child really puts a man in his place in the whole scheme of things.
On Monday, Vanessa, ever being the stoic one, cleaned and organized the condo that entire day despite starting labor at 3 AM that morning. I spent the day killing zombies on my computer as she denied having any regular pain, despite my near constant questioning as to her health. I brought her to the hospital once I discovered the presence of cervical mucus on a tissue in the bathroom late that afternoon. Objections abounded as I put her in the car at 5 PM and proceeded to the hospital, with her constantly telling me that she was fine and that she wanted to stay home and “organize things”. She was dilated 3 cm upon our arrival, and was sectioned an hour later.
Vanessa and baby are doing fine. The little guy was born Monday night here, Feb 23, a little after 7 PM, by C Section. Screaming rambunctious little guy, he was mouthing off to all involved as soon as his bodiless head popped out of her abdomen. With that presentation, my thoughts immediately turned to Linda Blair in The Exorcist, wondering what this very gentle Thai Obstetrician could possibly be thinking with all this awful newborn commentary directed at her. With each disparaging baby speak vulgarity that emanated from his profane little mouth, I knew my life was going to be completely different from then on. Killing zombies was going to be replaced with nipple shields, Huggies, breast pumps, and poop. With that obvious New York attitude that he inherited, I knew he was mine, despite the fact that he had a full head of hair.
Mom and 2.9 kg, 54 cm “almost full term” Richard Andrew are doing fine. As for me, I now have to start carrying a picture of the little guy, for one never knows when one has to go shopping at Central. Out of the wallet goes the picture of the dog, in goes the picture of the new satanic spawn. I’ve attached two for you; pick your favorite.
I won’t say which one I’m carrying...
Walking the mall tonight to do some shopping and get food, I was barraged by people I didn’t really know. Waitresses, sales girls, people that just worked in various stores here and there, in Central, Phuket’s largest mall, here in Thailand.
And the question everyone asked in a mixture of “Tinglish” was “How is madam?” The question was accompanied by some rotund maneuver with their hands, gently circling over their abdomen. These people knew Vanessa had been pregnant, and they were surprised to see that I was alone. I had no idea who most of these people were. How she makes so many friends is beyond me. Telling them that she’s in the hospital does nothing but cause them to exclaim something about “see baby”.
Of course, no one asked how I was. The birth of a child really puts a man in his place in the whole scheme of things.
On Monday, Vanessa, ever being the stoic one, cleaned and organized the condo that entire day despite starting labor at 3 AM that morning. I spent the day killing zombies on my computer as she denied having any regular pain, despite my near constant questioning as to her health. I brought her to the hospital once I discovered the presence of cervical mucus on a tissue in the bathroom late that afternoon. Objections abounded as I put her in the car at 5 PM and proceeded to the hospital, with her constantly telling me that she was fine and that she wanted to stay home and “organize things”. She was dilated 3 cm upon our arrival, and was sectioned an hour later.
Vanessa and baby are doing fine. The little guy was born Monday night here, Feb 23, a little after 7 PM, by C Section. Screaming rambunctious little guy, he was mouthing off to all involved as soon as his bodiless head popped out of her abdomen. With that presentation, my thoughts immediately turned to Linda Blair in The Exorcist, wondering what this very gentle Thai Obstetrician could possibly be thinking with all this awful newborn commentary directed at her. With each disparaging baby speak vulgarity that emanated from his profane little mouth, I knew my life was going to be completely different from then on. Killing zombies was going to be replaced with nipple shields, Huggies, breast pumps, and poop. With that obvious New York attitude that he inherited, I knew he was mine, despite the fact that he had a full head of hair.
Mom and 2.9 kg, 54 cm “almost full term” Richard Andrew are doing fine. As for me, I now have to start carrying a picture of the little guy, for one never knows when one has to go shopping at Central. Out of the wallet goes the picture of the dog, in goes the picture of the new satanic spawn. I’ve attached two for you; pick your favorite.
I won’t say which one I’m carrying...
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